Everyone - or at least most people - wants to have friends, but managers should never be friends with their staff. They should always be cordial and kind to them, of course, but not friends.
Why? Because being a manager requires you to be fair and objective, and it becomes very difficult to remain that way when friendship blurs the line between working and personal relationships.
I believe hiring friends is nearly always a critical mistake as disparate treatment can easily occur. For example, I know of one manager who hired her friend to work with her. It was a small office, and outside of the manager and the friend, there were only a few other employees.
This manager did not even try to hide her friendship, and she let her friend get away with behavior that was not tolerated from any other employee. Obviously, morale got worse and worse.
Blind to the fact that she was causing the problem by giving special benefits to her friend, the manager kept blaming staff for the failing morale. Eventually, the manager's boss saw what was happening and, after numerous warnings, let the manager go. She just could not let go of the friendship.
Another reason friendship should remain outside the workplace is staff cannot tell when you are talking to them as their friend and when you are talking to them as their boss. This kind of ambiguity in the workplace is just not tenable. Additionally, if you ever have to let a friend go, you will lose the friendship as well.
So many young managers think it is important to hire friends because they want to be liked and think this is the way to make it happen. However, being liked is not what business is about. It is always about the bottom line.
The bottom line is not concerned with who is friends with who, but rather who is contributing the most to helping it grow. The best contributors are always employees who respect their managers but do not cross the line into friendship.
Now go out and make sure that you do not hire friends or develop friendships with your staff.
You can do this!
Jerry Osteryoung is a consultant to businesses - he has directly assisted more than 3,000 firms. He is the Jim Moran Professor of Entrepreneurship (Emeritus) and Professor of Finance (Emeritus) at Florida State University. He was the founding executive director of The Jim Moran Institute and served in that position from 1995 through 2008. His newest book co-authored with Tim O'Brien, "If You Have Employees, You Really Need This Book," is a bestseller on Amazon.com. He can be reached by email at firstname.lastname@example.org.